


Sunflower Feelings

by oblivion_devotee



Category: Bohemian Rhapsody (Movie 2018), Queen (Band)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Heavy Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-12
Updated: 2019-01-12
Packaged: 2019-10-08 23:44:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,930
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17395988
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oblivion_devotee/pseuds/oblivion_devotee
Summary: Based off the song Sunflower Feelings by Kuzu Mellow. A beautiful night with your lover Brian, until everything goes down hill.





	1. Chapter 1

Brian was lying next to you, his hair flowing all across the blanket and his gaze focused on the soon-to-be night sky. It was still slightly bright out, and the sun was just setting below the horizon. There was a beautiful mix of oranges, pinks, and pastel blues painted across the sky. The colors surely showed your favorite time of the day, but tonight it was about Brian. He had longed to sit under the stars with you.

You never heard enough of it all, but you wouldn’t trade it in for the world. Listening to him ramble on about something he found deep interest in pleased your ears. He was so pure when it came to the world beyond Earth. The way his eyes lit up talking about it warmed your heart. And the smile that spread across his face when he realized you really did care about what he had to say. You never realized how interesting astrology was until you met Brian.

You looked at him as your fingers danced in the air, drawing the profile of his face. He was too caught up in the clouds to notice you, but you were smiling. A big bright and toothy smile was painted wide across your face. You couldn’t help how happy he truly made you. He treated you like you were the only girl in the world. The most important woman that ever set foot on Earth. Sometimes it was too much to handle, but nonetheless you appreciated every bit of him. The efforts he made to make you happy were extraordinary.

He looked at you, wide-eyed and slightly startled after hearing you giggle.

“What are you laughing at?” His hazel eyes looked more prominent under the glare of the setting sun. There was a twinkle in his eye, giving him an innocent stare. It only made you smile more, if that was possible. He was so beautiful to you. And though sometimes he protested, he trusted your judgement. You shrugged as you picked a blade of grass out of the field.

“Nothing much,” you mumbled with your lips pouted. He scooted himself closer to you, giving you a shy smile, and grazed his hand across your cheek. Your stomach tied in a knot at the sudden touch of his skin. Your muscles tensed and you couldn’t help but look him right in his golden hazel eyes. You loved him with your every being. There was no way to explain the way he made you feel inside.

“You know [Y/N], you make me really happy.” That was something he rarely ever told you. He was afraid to be too cliché and corny. But the moment was already beyond that and there was no point in stopping now. The two of you sat on a raggy old blanket in the middle of a large field, looking up at the stars that were now slowly blazing as time went on. It was dark already and you could just barely make out the features of Brian’s face. The only thing that remained was the glistening glare in his eyes that shined brighter than anything you’d ever seen before.

You nodded your head, hoping he saw through the darkness. You guys didn’t bring a flash light, or anything to illuminate your way back for that matter. The only guidance was the moon that seemed to shine vividly. More than it had on any other night you could recall. You were so self-aware of everything around you, listening to everything and noticing things that never seemed to show clear to you before.

The sharp chirps of the crickets, and how it was so silent you could hear them land softly in the grass. Or the way the sky didn’t look black but more of a deep purple. You never realized how you could see the curve in the atmosphere or how fast the clouds seemed to move. The feeling of the light wind running through your beautiful locks of hair, blowing it slightly on your face.

Brian brushed it out of your view and slowly leaned in for a kiss. A great thrill was sent throughout your body as soon as his soft pink lips pressed against yours. You grinned against his mouth and you could feel him  smile too. He pulled away, noses still touching and staring deep into your eyes.

“Thank you for sitting out here with me tonight,” he whispered softly.

You furrowed your brows and scoffed at his comment. “Are you serious? You don’t have to thank me.” Brian’s smile grew, his pearly white teeth showing. Making him happy was the only thing you wanted to do. His curly bangs slowly slid down his temple and fell in his eyes. He shook his head in an attempt to shake it away, his long curls bouncing.

**We’ve been dancing for so long under the stars**

**I feel as the grass will cut through my skin**

He jumped up and propped himself up on his elbows. “Let’s dance,” he said happily. You leaned back a bit and laughed out loud. When he didn’t giggle you knew he wasn’t playing around.

“Brian’s there’s no music,” you scoffed. He leaned forward. You’ve never seen him so giddy before.

He shrugged his shoulder nonchalantly, “There doesn’t need to be.” He put out his hand for yours to take, and you couldn’t help it.

You placed your hand in his and he slowly pulled you up off your feet. The both of you couldn’t stop giggling as he dragged you out further into the field. The stars glimmered and shined bright above you and the moon gave you a much needed spotlight. He grabbed your arms and pulled you close, placing them loosely around your neck. His hands slowly moved down to your waist as you both rocked slide to side in a steady rhythm.

**All the pills we take have seem to prolong**

**Our existence but I don’t feel alright**

The whole world seemed to revolve only around you and Brian. You and him were the only two people in a wide radius and it was nice for a change. Normally people were crowded around you and Brian. From going on tours, parties, and just hanging out with family and friends there was barely any time spent alone with the two of you.

You threw your head back, laughing and closing your eyes, taking in the whole moment. This was something that the two of you had never done before and it was surely a night to remember. It all seemed like a whole new world to you, as if you were completely detached from reality. He made you feel like you really were flouting through space.

He began to softly hum, which quickly turned into singing. His voice was calm and relaxing. The way his voice slowly transitioned into higher and lower notes soothed your nerves.

“The only music we really need,” he giggled and continued. You joined him, and the both of you were singing in unison. But you couldn’t help laughing in between. He brought his hand up to you cheek and brushed your hair behind your ear.

You shied away from his touch, wearing a bright red blush. He took your chin and focused your head to him. “Please look at me love,” he mumbled softly. You were like butter at his touch and no matter how long the both of you were together for you’d  _always_  be butter at his touch. There was something about the fiction when his skin grazed across yours. It sent a satisfying feeling throughout your body that let you know that you truly loved this man.

**I would rather be alone than have you**

**Every time I speak I feel myself fall**

“I know I don’t tell you this enough,” he sighed, “but you mean the absolute world to me. And I never want to lose you.” You’re face tingled and you knew you wore the brightest shade of red that had ever surfaced. The smile on his face showed that your blush didn’t go unnoticed. His words didn’t sound corny at the moment but regardless you didn’t care. It was something you longed to hear from him.

**Do you wish to find the truth in my lies**

“I love you, Brian,” you smiled. He suddenly took you into a tight embrace, holding you so close as if he'd ever let go you’d be gone in an instant. It was clear to see that what he said was really true. He never wanted to lose you for the world and he’d do anything for you. He'd never let you forget that. Despite the rare times he said it, he never failed to show it. And that what was really important. His actions over words. Brian was the complete opposite of “All bark and no bite”.

**Sorry darlin’ there’s no truth here**

**No**

For now, at least.


	2. Chapter 2

****

**It’s just the two of us, my dear**

You two were alone for the first time in forever, having trouble keeping your hands off each other. The night was filled with giggling and joking around. There was nothing like sitting under the midnight sky with someone you were absolutely in love with. It was nice, having it just you and Brian. Being in his company,  _regardless_  of the circumstances, gave you a kind of calm feeling that you longed to have with someone. There was no one quite like Brian.

Sitting with him that night was the best night the two of you ever spent together. There was nothing that could ever have ruined that moment for you. Two kids totally in love, sitting under the stars and dancing away. It was the perfect relationship to everyone, especially you. There was no one who could come in between the bond you and Brian shared.

The two of you went way back, even before the relationship. He always seemed to have a sweet crush on you. He’d take you out to eat, and to save him the embarrassment, he never called them a date. John, Roger, or Freddie would join to make it less awkward. And it was a riot when all three of them came along. But like everything else you loved about Brian, you would never trade it in for the world. Every moment spent with him was like Heaven on Earth.

He never changed with you either. He still took you out to eat and go to the movies every once in awhile. One time he even surprised you after tour with a whole bunch of sunflowers, your favorites, scattered across the flat. But that one night was something completely different. He never pulled a stunt like that before. And it was surely the last.

**Listen to me don’t you hear**

**I only fell for you**

“Please, please just stop for a minute [Y/N],” he begged. His hand was loosely gripped onto yours in a poor attempt to stop you. You quickly pulled away and scoffed. His eyes were watery and you could clearly see the pain he felt. “Leave me alone already,” you demanded, knowing it was a straight bullet to Brian’s fragile heart. He winced, clenching his jaw tight as a tear slowly made it’s way down his chin. “I’m… So… Sorry,” he mumbled softly and slowly.

You nodded your head, tears filling up in your eyes. You couldn’t look at him like this, seeing him in so much pain. And deep down, you believed you caused it all. “No Brian, it’s over. It’s been over. And it’ll always be over.” You started walking away but he ran up next to you. His tall frame trembling as he hurried up in front of you. He towered over you, looking down at you with deep regret.

And despite the situation, you felt calm and safe in his presence. The same thrilling feeling that you had when the two of you were together. Hot tears were quickly streaming down his face as he shuddered. You furrowed your brows at him and bit your lip, trying to keep the tears back. But they came down anyway.

You wiped your face with your sleeve and sniffled. “I don’t want this to be over,” he whispered. His voice was shaky and his bottom lip was trembling. You turned away, not wanting to see him in such an awful state. It was obvious to see he was a mess, noting his freshly shaved face and clean hair. He must have known he was going to see you. And according to Roger a week ago, he had a full beard and bundles of knots through his locks. He was a total mess, as he explained it.

**I only fell for you baby**

“You’re the only girl-,” he stopped to correct himself, “woman that I want to be with.” He paused for a moment to take a deep breath, shuddering as it went in. He slowly reached his hands to the sides of your arms. His hands gentle against your soft skin. Your body ached remembering how tender his touch was. “I can’t do without having you.”

You focused your gaze back to him, looking him in his deep hollow eyes. The hazel glimmer you remember that special night was now gone. Seeing it disappeared was like a total stab to the heart, as if it was a deliberate personal attack. He was no longer full of life like he had when you danced with him. His voice was rough, not the soothing and mellow sound you remember.

You closed your eyes, feeling a single tear roll down the side of your cheek. Your eyes sprung open at the touch of his hand across your cheek. He wiped it away as he moved his face close to yours. You melted at his touch, just as you always had. “[Y/N], I only fell for you. No body else but you.” You placed your hand on top of his.

You clenched your jaw tight, grinding your teeth together. He slowly leaned in to kiss you but you turned away. His lips softly grazed across your cheek. “No,” you muttered faintly, “I can’t do this with you.” You felt the grip on your arm tighten as he let out a whimper. The sound of his cries pained you, deep beyond the physical feelings in your body. “I just want you [Y/N], you’re the only one who makes me truly happy.”

You pressed your elbows on his chest and slowly pushed him away. Your brows frowned as you nodded your head. “No,” you whispered, voice brittle and weak, “I said no. I can’t do this anymore.” You started to run off but was taken back yet again by Brian. His eyes were bloodshot, red and swollen, and his cheeks wet. The tears didn’t stop coming down.

His lips were trembling as he tried to speak, but nothing came out. “Good-bye, Bri.” He furrowed his brows as he looked you deep into your eye. “Bye, [Y/N].” There was something about the fact he didn’t add “good” that haunted you. The sorrow in his voice echoed in the back of your mind and no matter how hard you tried to forget it, you couldn’t. You knew you were still in love with him, but never would you admit it.

**Don’t you let them see your fear**

**Promise not to shed a tear**

Brian was constantly at the back of your mind. Going to the store was a chore. You were use to buying all kind of hair products for his long curls. Seeing crazy shirts made you think of him. And there was always the fear he would be there. It was more of hope that you would see him. Despite how upset you were, you missed him dearly. The only thing you wanted in the world was to bring back that special night.

Just a few hours of happiness meant the world to you for a whole month. It was amazing how something so little made such a big difference to you. Everytime you thought about it though, you wanted to burst into tears. His eyes were so big and eager to learn, to experience everything life had to offer, but his eyes were now dull. The colors in his eyes were a different shade than before, and so was the sky. The sunset was no longer you’re favorite time of day. Sunflowers were no longer your favorite types of flowers. And astrology was the last thing you ever wanted to hear about.

There was no way Brian would ever leave your mind. You were still deeply in love with him, but there was no possible way the two of you could be together again. And that killed you deeply inside. He was all you wanted. The only man who made you happy. He made you feel safe when things were all wrong, like the way he held you tight as you laid together in bed. How he held you that night, trying to never let go of you.

**I only fell for you**

**I only fell for you baby**

You turned around to Brian to see him one last time. He only looked at you, wide-eyed and, surprisingly, full of hope. You wanted to run to his embrace, feel his touch one last time, and just cry in his arms. You just wanted to tell him you were sorry. “I only fell for you,” he smiled through cries, “Always you.”


End file.
